We are so delighted to welcome Ahlam Bolooki to our welcome. We hope you enjoy her debut piece titled “Happy Endings”
The thing about “a happy ending” is that the statement contradicts the constantly changing nature of life. It’s a concept that suggests just because a certain situation at hand has taken a positive turn that it has closed its doors to the possibility of further misfortune or unhappiness. Is there such a thing as an ending until our last living day after all? Unless there’s an argument that a person’s final hours alive can form the setting of a happy scenario, we are back where we started.
Could it not be that just because the prince’s status could win him Cinderella or any other girl with a shoe size of, let’s say 37, that his search method of choice was not the best call of judgment towards finding compatibility and perhaps not the wisest key to the pursuit of his soul mate? That after the glitz and glamour of her royal wedding, Cinderella felt trapped in confinement and realized her days of taking orders and obligations have only seen an upgrade? Does the nature of any human life really allow for such a thing as living happily ever after for all our remaining days without obstacles, regrets, deprivation, illness or loss?
To the general public and societal norms, the concept of happy endings suggests that marriages are happy and separations are not, giving a blind sight to marriages that last a lifetime in misery or abuse. It implies that a life of monetary luxuries is happier than a modest one, despite the tension, responsibly and lonely company that might come along with it; Not to say that financial constraints can’t cause the same circumstances but either case certainly does not guarantee the peace of mind leading to the ultimate goal of a happy ending. It proposes that having children is a blessing and a lifetime without the responsibility and joy of parenthood is a definite misfortune that could not be replaced by other joys. That the size or location of a person’s house or car they can afford to drive is directly proportionate to the joy in their hearts. That the higher we climb the ladder in our careers the more “successful” we are, because it allows us to rub shoulders with the “right” people and opens doors to “opportunities” to achieve, what exactly? That the fans that come with fame bring admiration and love from masses of people, and in turn, how would you ever be lonely?
True happiness is a state of mind. It lies in the contentment with our realities at any given point, the mental strength to take life’s obstacles as temporary challenges and the faith to live through them knowing that they shall pass. It’s figuring out the reality of life in its true unpredictable nature and letting go of the idealistic expectations that all our plans will fall through as we hope. Happiness is in enjoying the small things with larger values than we realize and sharing special moments with those who surround us. Above all, happiness comes from being honest with ourselves when defining what truly makes us happy, because happiness to me is not what it is to you and that’s ok.
Khalil Gibran, in The Prophet, spoke of joy and sorrow together and wrote that “Your joy is your sorrow unmasked”. He duly describes that the matter which bring us joy are rooted in a previous sorrow and that the opposite is also true in matters of grief. Khalil Gibran was a writer who I consider my favourite of all time, not only because his heartfelt descriptions are so beautifully written but mostly because he understood life down to its core. He described joy and sorrow as inseparable when he said, “Together they come, and when one sits alone with you at your board, remember that the other is asleep upon your bed”.
Author: Ahlam Bolooki